


Hate the Rain

by TXJ1123



Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-10
Updated: 2015-09-01
Packaged: 2018-04-13 22:21:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4539603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TXJ1123/pseuds/TXJ1123
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kakashi isn't good at talking about himself, or letting others close.<br/>Maybe with time he will learn to live for his own happiness instead of only shouldering others' burdens and sorrows.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Lightning streaked the sky illuminating the falling sheets of rain brilliant shades of purple and blue.  
Standing watch at the cave entrance, Kakahshi sighed and muttered  
“The only enjoyable part of a thunderstorm is the lightning."  
His recon team stood in the cave perched above a tree filled canyon. He didn't expect much trouble, the rain was coming down so thick that he was forced to use senses other than his eyes.  
"Why do you only like the lightning?" Sakura asked, leaving him to muse that Tsuande and been training Sakura to use more than her fist.

"Because he uses lightning, duh!" Naruto responded, earning him an eye roll from Sakura. Kakashi simply kept his back to the two, while Sakura shushed Naruto and they finished settling in.

His mind drifted back to a night very similar to the present one.  
His team was returning from the Hidden Mist village. They had been sent to receive information on rebel forces that desired to restart the war. Having obtained the files they were on their way back to their village. So far the mission had gone smoothly, almost too smoothly. Rin and Shikaku were asleep, they had moved as fast as possible until it became evident that the storm would be a fierce one. Kakashi had thought about summoning Pakkun to keep him company, but the little nin dog was deathly afraid of storms. Sighing he leaned against the side of the cave entrance watching the lightning streak through the sky.

 

Kakashi was brought back to the present by a slender shoulder bumping into his. He looked at her and she grinned back at him. For a moment, his memory played with him and it was Rin standing by his side, then dark hair morphed to brilliant pink and Kakashi let his eye crinkle in a warm grin.

 

"Really Kakashi, I can take the first watch if you want. This storm seems to be putting you to sleep." Her voice was uncharacteristically soft and her eyes filled with concern. It made him blush slightly, she'd caught him spaced out, trapped in past memories.

"You sure know how to make a man feel old Sakura!" he grinned at her knowing she'd understand the expression behind the mask.  
"Don't change the subject. The look in your eyes a moment ago had nothing to do with age."

"Hn." He knew better than to argue. A quick glance over his shoulder told him that he no longer had Naruto to distract her with.

"You never did answer; why is lightning the only thing you like about a storm?" Again those concerned sincere eyes. Green eyes may as well have been brown, as he could hear Rin admonishing him for being distant with teammates. Kakashi cursed himself again, the weather and the company were making him nostalgic.

"You're hearing has become rather fine tuned in the last few years, Sakura I'm impressed." That should get her talking about herself and not him. Sakura loved compliments, that had never changed about her.  
"Yes, Lady Tsunade suggested I spend a few months training with Kiba to improve my senses of smell and hearing. As I was tired of being hindered when I could not see my opponent. But that won't get you out of answering my question." Her smile switched suddenly from smug to experated.  
"Geeze Kakashi, if you don't want to answer something just say so. It's so insulting when you side step and try to change the subject to get out of talking about yourself." Her voice had raised slightly, not enough to disturb Naruto, but the frustration was evident in her features. He'd watched these two grow and battle for their lives, the village's life, even his own life. Why did he still avoid letting them close? She no longer called him sensei but friend, could he not do the same in return?

The dramatic sigh that he exhaled was more at himself than her question. He slid down the wall and patted the cold stone floor next to him, offering her a seat, before beginning his tale.  
"You should know by now, I don't like talking about myself. Most of what you know about my past you've heard from third parties." He chuckled at the half shamed half shocked look on her face.  
"Yes, I've known. Many believe that if you know a person's history you will understand him or her better. So I am not mad with the people who told you or you guys. You've been respectful with the knowledge. That still doesn't answer your question does it?" He rubbed the back of his head.  
"No, but if you-" Kakashi put a hand up to hush her. Obito's voice playing the part of conscience urging him to stop being a coward and trust a little of his heart to a comrade that he had trusted with his life multiple times.  
"It was a night much like this one, it was my last mission before becoming a member of ANBU. I was leading the team, Rin and Shikakui were with me. We'd made it to a cave, pretty much like this, just as the rain started. It didn't take long before we couldn't see a foot outside of the cave due to the heavy rainfall. I told the other two to settle in and I'd keep watch as sight was of no use in those conditions. Really my nose and ears weren't of any use either. Shikaku wasted no time falling asleep, the storm working as a lullaby. Rin was quite different tho, she loved the rain, really she loved everything about water so she was too excited to sleep. She came and sat by me. It only took till the first roll of thunder followed shortly by a blinding streak of lightning to see that Rin clearly was afraid of thunderstorms. Her shoulders tensed and she would jump slightly with every rumble."

"A water nin that is afraid of a thunderstorm?" Teasing Rin could be dangerous business, but with a fellow teammate asleep, I felt safe that I wouldn't get much more than a punch on the arm.  
"I'll have you know Kakashi that it is only the thunder and lightning that bother me." I received the punch I had expected.  
"Good thing she wasn't trained by Lady Tsuande, or you wouldn't of had a sensei." Kakashi teased, Sakura nodded in agreement.

 

"Hn. Thus why they are called THUNDER-storms." Another clap of lightning and Rin's jump had closed the space between us. I chuckled at her, the timing had been too perfect.  
"I guess the lightning doesn't bother you much?" she asked shyly putting a small amount of space between us.  
"It had been years since Obito's death and the day I told her that it was him, not me who'd chosen to rescue her. We'd both lost several more friends in the final years of the war.  
Through all of it she had become my closest friend. I'd known when we were younger that Rin had a crush on me, she'd even confessed it shortly after Obito's death but I couldn't handle it then and gave her every reason not to like me. Time has a funny way of changing things though. That night with her so close I realized that I wanted her to stay close.  
We'd been talking for awhile, and the night air was getting cooler and cooler. I was given my opportunity when she started to shiver, I pulled out my blanket and wrapped it around her shoulders pulling her closer to me."  
Kakashi paused his story, the wind had died down but the rain still showed no sign of stopping. He had expected Sakura to interrupt him, but she didn't.  
“She leaned against me and said that she wished we could light a fire so that she could read her book. I inherited my first "Icha Icha" book from Rin."

"That stupid love novel stuff you've been reading?" I questioned. She blushed slightly.  
"It's not your average no plot love novel. Really you should read it some time." Her eyes held mischief and told me that there was something more to the story than that. I never asked what she was up to because the sky lit up with a brilliant display of lightning. I tightened my grip around Rin as she flinched.  
"So tell me what makes this book so much better?" I asked her for no more reason than to take her mind off of the storm.  
"The women in the story are actually strong, they're like real female ninja, not simply needing to be rescued all the time. And the main male character is always looking out for the others with a sort of mysterious side where he won't tell anyone about his past. You're laughing at me aren't you?" Rin stopped, I could tell even in the dark with lightning that she was blushing.  
"Why would I be laughing at you? I asked you why you liked the book didn't I?" she slapped at my hand when I ruffled her hair.  
Another roll of thunder, the storm was moving past as the time between the thunder and clap of lightning seemed to be increasing.  
I pulled Rin snug against my chest with her back to me when the thunder sounded as second time, she had no choice but to look as the lightning streaked through the sky. She shivered and I heard the words that lead me to my undoing.  
"That was absolutely beautiful!" she whispered in awe.  
"Just like you." I whispered in her ear in return.  
"I don't remember consciously doing it, but I slid my mask down and kissed her at that point. To this day Rin is the only person that I have ever taken this mask off for.  
It wasn't six months later that Rin's name was added to the memorial stone a ways below Obito's. It rained the rest of that day, and on the day of her funeral. It had rained the day we lost Obito.  
It was raining when the Fourth gave his life, and it was raining that day when I found my father. It was raining when I found Naruto after he fought with Sasuke.  
It is said that the rain washes away sorrow, but to me it seems more like it brings it."

"I would hate the rain too."  
Sakura wrapped her arms tightly around him, burying her face into his chest. He hadn't meant to lay all of his sorrow on her, but once he started he couldn't stop.  
"But why do you like the lightning?" she asked a tear rolling down her cheek and soaking into his shirt. He chuckled, in all of that he still had not answered the question in full and she hadn't missed it either.  
"Had it not been for the lightning I never would have gotten my first kiss, nor come to intrust my heart to another." 

As the storm lit up the cave entrance, Kakashi’s chest tightened, as once again past and present overlapped.  
He tightened his arm around her momentarily returning her embrace, then ruffled her hair with his free hand.

Sakura swatted half heartedly, muttering “Why do you do that?”

 

“That, I may tell you another time.”


	2. Blame the Fourth...and Maybe dad.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which, Genma has game,and Kakashi make's himself at home
> 
> or
> 
> Kakashi sticks his foot in it and trys to soul search and apologize to Sakura  
> \---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The open training ground was littered with rubble, like a small earthquake had toppled a castle. Contrary to normal, it was Sakura who had been making the earth barriers, and Kakashi who had spent the better part of his chakra shattering them.

Sakura slumped over, hands on her knees, winded from the repeated exertions. It had been fun watching learn to go from focusing her chakra into a small point to spreading it wide and uniform. She had become good a tearing walls down, physically and metaphorically he mused, now she wanted a rock solid defense to go with her earth shattering offense.  
Kakashi smiled approvingly and approached her. Reaching out and ruffling her sweat soaked hair without thought.

“Good job - ahh, hey.. ow!” he quickly yanked his hand back from her iron grasp, and looked at the offending bite mark.

“You’re doing it again, Kakashi.” she growled at him.

He wasn’t completely sure if she was referring to the hair ruffling specifically, or the fact that it made her feel like he was treating her as his student again.

It wasn’t a huge change, but every since that night they were held up by the thunderstorm, Sakura had been doing subtle things to remind him that they were equals now when he backslid into ‘teacher/student’ mentality.

This one hadn’t been so subtle though.

“I warned you Hatake.” he winced, it was never good when she only used his last name. She sounded just like Tsunade.

He placed his hands up in mock surrender, and pseudo barrier. 

“You know I can’t help it, Sakura-chan, you will always be my student.” the moment the words left his mouth, he knew it had been the wrong thing to say.

Her expression changed in a flicker, it went from vexed to hurt, to forcibly controlled neutral.

“Oh. Well thank you for the training, I think this will help me pass. I’ve got an appointment I just remembered. See ya.” and she was gone, before he could even finish processing what had, or more so hadn’t, just happened.

“Pass?”

The question went unanswered however he had company to help kick himself for being a fool.

“Don’t need a Kekkei-genkai to see that you fucked that one up.” Genma stated straightening out of the crouch he had landed in.  
His Anbu mask covered his face, still Kakashi could picture the ‘you're an idiot’ smirk on the other man’s face.

“You broke cover to tell me what I already know? I hope you don’t make a habit of that once I am…” he paused, saying the word ‘hokage’ didn’t feel right in reference to himself. He had been accepting the idea purely by telling himself that it was only an interim position, that he was just keeping the seat warm until Naruto was old enough and settled enough to run the village.

“Hokage. Ho-kah-gay - sheeze, no wonder you are clinging to the past. The future has you scared stiff.” Genma’s point accentuated by the fact that Kakashi had to take a micro step forward to keep his balance after the not so soft thump the man gave to his shoulder.

“The constant presence of two Anbu following me at all times is enough to remind me of what is coming. I’ve accepted it, it does not mean that I am, or will ever be ok with all aspects of it.” Kakashi didn’t have to add that it was mainly the lack of privacy that he detested.

“Hey, look. I don’t know why you said it, nor why it pissed her off so much, but I do know enough to know that leaving that Kunoichi in a bad mood isn’t good for anybody. Pick up her favorite dish and take it to her and grovel at her feet.”

Kakashi gave the other man a hard glare in response.

“She isn’t Tsunade.” Kakashi stated firmly. Sakura couldn’t be bought so easily, nor did he like how it felt too personal.

“No, but she is the woman’s apprentice, and as your training just insured, the next personal medical-nin for the Hokage.”

Kakashi shook his head, his shock audible.

“She never said.” Kakashi rubbed his chin in thought. “I guess I just assumed it was all to expand her field training.”

“For a man who is about to be in charge of the whole village, you sure don’t seem to know a lot of what is going on. You have my suggestion. Best of luck.”  
With that Genma dashed into the trees and melted into the landscape.

Kakashi rubbed the back of his head, and got a nose full of his own scent in the process. Priorities, he would go home and get cleaned up before he decided to talk to Sakura. Maybe then he could figure out what to say. Or why her reaction bothered him so much.

\----------------------

As Kakashi showered he tried clearing his mind. This lead to reminiscing, memories of his father patting his head after a good training session or when he had returned home from a long mission.  
Minato doing the same, even when Kakashi was being particularly stubborn or combative with Obito. 

“Why do you do that Sensei.” he’d asked Minato almost the exact same question as Sakura had asked him. It had been one of his last missions with the man before he’d become Hokage. Kakashi vetted for a shinobi, yet still barely older than a kid.

“It’s a habit I picked up from a dear friend. I guess in a world were showing emotion is frowned upon, it’s my way of showing approval and caring”  
Looking back, Kakashi suspected now that the good friend his mentor had referred to had been his father.

“I miss having missions with Sensei.” Rin had declared walking down a back road in the village after an afternoon of training.

“I know it annoyed you, but the way he use to ruffle our hair when we’d done well or needed the extra encouragement. It was comforting.” Kakashi had reached out and mussed her hair, receiving a laugh, and firm shove.

That was when he’d picked it up. He had never given much thought to it. The reassuring hand on a shoulder, or musing their hair to make sure they knew he was there. It was his way of reassuring and comforting, of showing - affection?

He could think of a handful of other times he had done the same to peers. More of a firm grip on the shoulder, but he could recall a time or two where his hand had been slapped away from Guy and Genma’s hair.

As Kakashi dressed he was left with the nagging question of how to share that concept. Sakura had made clear that she didn’t appreciate his actions, but anything else would feel forced and insincere. 

He sighed, stepping onto his window ledge, the dynamic was changing between them. What it was changing into and how he should respond were questions he still didn’t have answers for.

A box of anko dumplings and a couple cartons of Miso Soup were in his future, maybe then he’d feel better.

\-----------------

“Yo.” What else was he supposed to say?  
“Uh.” Clearly Sakura hadn’t expected him. Her lack of vocabulary coupled with the ratty t-shirt and sweats made that clear.  
“Is that anko I smell?” she asked taking in a deep breath through her nose.

Kakashi couldn’t help but chuckle. Genma did have a knack for knowing how to handle women, or at least a good short game. 

“May I come in?” he was already stepping past her headed for the table with his peace offering.

“Sure, make yourself at home.” she quipped back, but there wasn’t any heat in her voice.

Kakashi set to work laying out the goods he had brought in, not missing her perplexed look when he snagged two soup bowls from the kitchen without having to ask where they were kept. In all honesty, her kitchen wasn’t set up that much different from his and process of elimination coupled with a lucky guess worked in his advantage.

She surprised him a little when she chose the seat next to him instead of across from him.  
Saying thanks they ate in silence. Kakashi let it sit to the point of almost uncomfortable before he spoke.

“So, you’re putting in for personal medic to the Hokage?” he asked quirking an eyebrow upward.

“Yes. I thought I’d mentioned it. It seems the most logical thing to do.” she replied. She had set her bowl aside and was watching him now.

“Well, maybe you should have gone to Iruka-sensei for training then. You’ll be healing more paper cuts than constructing barriers in that line of work.” This received the half-amused snort he had expected.

“And when have the placement test for any shinobi position ever been accurate?” she asked rhetorically.  
“Our first chunin exam may have been the closest to accurate, but it wasn’t meant to be as horrid as it was.”

For a moment Kakashi entertained the thought of how things may have been different if he had waited another year before nominating them.

“I can’t imagine things turning out any better for the village, or for us individually.” She said, leaving no doubt in his mind that she knew what he had been thinking.

“When did you start reading me so well?” The question slipped from his thoughts and out his mouth reflexively, but he was more surprised at himself to find that he wanted to know the answer.

“Huh, if that were really the case, I wouldn’t be so baffled as to why one minute we’re like this -” she gestured at the space between them “normal friends, the next it’s like I’m a twelve year old again.” She held his eyes without flinching.

Kakashi closed his eyes, silently willing her to understand that friendship, let alone anything resembling normalcy, wasn’t natural for him.

Sakura snatched the box of dumplings off the table suddenly.

“I think they were running a behind the scenes special for the next “Itcha Itcha” movie tonight.” she sing-songed heading to the living room.  
Sakura set the box on a low sitting coffee table, then plopped down on the floor between the sofa and table using the sofa for a backrest..

Kakashi mused to himself that her furniture would last forever if that was how she tended to use it.  
Her actions told him that she’d forgiven him, and wouldn’t push the matter any further. Still he knew she deserved an explanation. Or at least a confession of how pitiful and socially awkward he was.

At first he perched on sofa next to where she was seated. He watched with mild amusement as she devoured a smaller dumpling in two bites.

“These are amazing.” Sakura exclaimed reaching for a second with one hand and the remote with another.

Kakashi plucked the remote out of her hand before she could hit the power button.

“Is it the hair ruffling, or something else?” he asked, sliding onto the floor next to her.

She wrinkled her brow at him, then focused on her treat, like it would provide her the answer.

“The ruffling yes, but not for the obvious reason.” she replied cautiously. Kakashi waited knowing there was more to come.  
“It can be a little annoying, but I guess it wouldn’t be so bad, if it wasn’t followed up by you doing something like you did earlier today.” she took a small bite of the dumpling and watched him for a response.

Part of him wanted to play coy, and act like he didn’t have a clue. The part of him that had shelled out half an B-Ranked mission’s pay for that box of dumplings knew better. Funny that voice sounded a lot like his old sensei.

“How often do I-”  
she replied before he could finished forming the question..  
“Almost every time you make a friendly gesture. You follow it up with some sort of statement that makes me feel like you just see me as a kid. Today hurt more than usual. I probably deserved it for biting you, but I had been trying so hard to get you to realize that you do this. You just didn’t seem to be taking the hint.” 

She grabbed his hand at this and examined where she had chomped down on it earlier in the day. A small purple semi-circle remained. She ran her thumb over the marking, sending a chill through him from the contact.

“I’m sorry.” she let his and go and looked at him, the remorse in her eyes digging at him.  
He hadn’t come here looking for an apology for her actions, he had come because he’d been a jerk and didn’t want to lose the friendship they had built.

Well at least he had finally admitted to himself why he was so upset by her reaction.

“It’s ok, I may have deserved that. Shiba does the same if he feels that I am not focusing enough. I know I keep saying this, but I’m not good with words. I don’t think of you as still a child Sakura.” he hesitated, the next part was going to sound lame no matter how he said it.

“My father would always ruffle my hair when we finished training or when he returned home from a long mission. I guess most parents hug their kids when they get home from work, my dad was usually covered in dirt or worse, so he’d tousle my hair and send me on my way while he got cleaned up.  
When he wasn’t there anymore Manito kind of took his place, the pat on the head turning into a firm hand on the shoulder as I got older, still there were those times when he’d get hold of my hair. It took me awhile to realize that those were his way of saying that he cared.  
So I guess you can blame the Fourth, and maybe my dad.” Kakashi finished with a forced chuckle. His mouth was dry from talking more than he was use to.

“And that whole bit about me always being your student?” she asked raising a brow at him.

“Ah, the fact that you were my student will never change. However, I was out of line to address you like a child.”

“I think you’ve more than made up for it, and I promise not to bite you again. Unless you lose focus” she smiled innocently at him then shifted onto her knees facing him reaching over to take the tv remote back. However last moment her hand switched directions and headed for the top of his head.  
Kakashi saw it coming and deftly grabbed her wrist, pulling her off balance and into a hug.  
It was awkward, but Kakashi found himself laughing at her displeasured grunt against his chest.

“Thank you for dinner, and training.” she said sitting up after a moment, a slight blush across her cheeks.

“I should be thanking you for being patient with me and listening to my stories.” he replied scrubbing the back of his head.

“Not a problem.” she replied turning to tv on, with the remote that Kakashi hadn’t realized she had managed to snag until that moment.

They sat in companionable silence watching the behind the scenes footage. Well, silence if you didn’t count the way Sakura tended to talk to the tv and respond to the host questions.

Kakashi got up with the commercial break and got himself a glass of water. He asked her if she wanted something to drink and didn’t get an answer.

Returning to the living room he found why. Sakura had fallen asleep.

He sat through the end of the show then gently scooped her up setting her on the sofa and covering her with the light throw that decorated the back.  
Placing his hand on top of her head he wished her goodnight and set off for home.


	3. Realizations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sakura may or may not realize some things...  
> _--------------------------------

Sakura woke the next morning slumped on the edge of her sofa. Her neck and shoulders were stiff, and her right leg was on pins and needles from hanging off the edge. She cautiously sat up and stretched, then, wincing at the pain she knew was to follow, stood up carefully placing weight on the still sleeping leg. 

There was irony in the fact that sleeping one night on her sofa left her feeling more ragged than traveling at top speed for a full day only to sleep on a cave floor did.

Cave floor, pouring rain, lightning - Kakashi.  
Her thoughts had been dwelling on him a lot lately.  
Right after the war they hadn't spent much time together. Her medical expertise was needed in the village, and Kakashi being in line to be the Sixth had been on diplomatic duties.

That is until he puppy dog eyed his way back onto the active roster, taking her with him.  
He called active duty a break.  
She couldn't really disagree.

They weren't really Team Seven any more. Root was being restructured, and Sai was a big part of that. Naruto was working solo and playing humanitarian when not. Sasuke, well, he was Sasuke and that meant a boat load of angst and atonement that he needed to deal with. And of course he needed to do it on his own. 

It had occurred to her on their first post war mission together that working with Kakashi as an equal seemed to be a natural fit for her. However short lived it would be before he became Hokage.

It wasn't until Shizune pointed out that she went wherever Tsunade went, that Sakura realized the position would be open. While getting her foot in the door so she would be there when Naruto took office had been her game plan, she found the more she looked into it the more likely she was to have the position under Kakashi's administration.

Then the thunderstorm happened.  
She could count on one hand the number of times she had hugged Kakashi, and all of them at that point included tears.  
She had watched him struggle to let his guard down enough to open up and trust her with what was weighing on his mind that night.

At first she figured it had been something about the mission. However the way he looked at her, she still didn't have words for it. His eyes had a soft far away look. She had prodded him mostly out of habit from doing it with her friends, still expecting some bit of shinobi wisdom to spew from behind his mask.

As he spoke, sharing something that she was almost positive no one else alive knew about, she could picture the night he described. She had known before that night that he had out lived the rest of his genin team, but hearing him say it, seeing the pain etched on his face she fell apart. 

How had he hurt so much, lost so many and not traveled the dark road that Sasuke did?

So she clung to him, without thought, she didn't want him to feel alone, to carry his burden alone anymore.  
Then he ruffled her hair, and she remembered that he had been fine before she was ever part of his life.

Whether it was the hair ruffle then, or the fact that she had gotten a glimpse of Kakashi beyond the solid leader that he is, Sakura had become hightendly aware of how often he slipped back into ‘sensei-mode’.

With advice from Shizune, Sakura had focused her thoughts to being well prepared for the trials that came with the position she sought.

She had confidence in her medical ability, and her combat abilities.  
But a few not so subtle comments from Lady Tsunade had her rethinking her defense abilities.

"You may have to allow others to fight while you protect and heal, be they the Kage or others placed in your charge."  
Immediately images of their first big mission came to mind. Defending the old bridge builder while the boys fought.  
Kakashi had saved both of them back then.

She was older and stronger now, she wouldn't let that happen again.

So, she mentioned the need of barrier and defense practice to Kakashi on their next mission. He had been more than eager for the opportunity, still being in the midst of sorting out his abilities without the Sharingan. She chose her words carefully when she explained her situation to him, only saying that she was training to take Shizune’s place. She didn’t want it to look like she was chasing him or Naruto around, still trying to find away to catch up.

All of this compounded that day on the training field. So naturally, wanting to be treated like an adult, she had acted like a child (or ninken as he later implied) and bit him. She had told him the last time he had pat her head and said something to pacify her that she would arrange it so that Genma would be the Sixth. That had earned her a fake dirty look, and a good laugh as both had been well aware of the ANBU standing watch near by, and whom the chakra signatures belonged to.  
She had figured this time he was testing her, but his reaction made her wonder. When he became defensive she only felt hurt. Angry at herself for making a mess of the friendship they had been building, and angry at him for being so complicated.  
Then she stormed off. She heard his shock at her statement about passing, and prayed that he didn’t misinterpret her intentions and think that she was planning to join ANBU. She had picked up on his uncomfortable reaction when Naruto had seriously mentioned joining for the experience. 

Sakura had gone home and berated herself, imagining that she would be back on regular hospital duty after that episode. 

Then last night happened.

Him diverting her bad attempt at affectionate humor into a hug bringing a slight blush to her face. His message had been clear, he wasn’t good with affection, a hand on the shoulder or the annoying hair missing was his version of a hug.  
So why had she done that? What in the world possessed her to be so cheeky around him?

 

On some level she knew, she’d felt this way once before, when she was a kid. Except Sasuke always left her feeling unworthy and unwanted.

Sakura shook her head hard to clear her thoughts, telling herself that she didn’t have a crush on Kakashi. It was simply that she was hadn’t made new friends in quite awhile, and while Kakashi wasn’t a new acquaintance, this friendship was definitely new.

Having dressed for the day while recapping the previous evening in her head, Sakura paused in her living room debating between having breakfast at home or stopping off at a tea shop for a quick bite. She had just settled on going out when the window in her kitchen rattled.  
There wasn’t anyone to be seen outside the window, however a scroll lay on windowsill.

“Sasuke is leaving. It will be long term, and we both know he won’t say goodbye. Better hurry and catch him at the gate.”

It was Sai’s looping handwriting, 

Without a second thought Sakura did exactly what the note had suggested for her to do.


	4. Bye-Bye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Sasuke hijacks my chapter  
> or in which  
> Kakashi gets caught being a creeper
> 
> and in which the author is #SorryNotSorry for the bad (lame) chapter split/cliff hanger

Kakashi didn't make it out of Sakura's place unnoticed. Sasuke fell into stride next to him before he had made it a quarter of a block down the road. His presence so sudden that it startled the less seasoned ANBU operative tailing him.

As Kakashi signaled the rookie to stand down he chuckled.

"Trying to help my case? I've told Tsunade that this is ridiculous. If I'm not safe inside the village then there is no hope for the village." Kakashi sighed.

"Hn, and she didn't agree with you?" Sasuke replied, signaling Kakashi to follow him into the park instead of on his normal pathway home.

Kakashi followed the young man and shrugged.

"No, she does. It is the council that won't listen to reason, but she won't come out and say that either." Kakashi sighed, knowing his days before he would be in her very position were numbered.

"Sounds like you are preaching to the wrong choir then. Elders only like ideas that are their own, so make them think it is theirs." Sasuke had always been direct and his new found heart hadn't changed that.

"Working on that."

Sasuke had led them to a picnic bench, and taken a seat on the table. They watched the night sky in silence for a few minutes. Kakashi allowed one eye to take in the numerous stars while enjoying the night breeze and keeping the other eye on Sasuke.

He wasn't a young boy anymore, he'd grown into a man, albeit still young. His face no longer carried the tension of anger and hate, but his eyes still held pain and sorrow.

Regret, Kakashi realized, regret of the things he had done, but even more so, of the time he had missed here with people who cared. Sorrow that he had been blind to caring and friendship he had here.

"I'm leaving." he stated suddenly, for a moment Kakashi wondered if Sasuke was aware of his profiling, however his body language in the next second made it clear that he meant on a mission.

"Karin contacted me. These Madara factions that have been cropping up have been crossing paths with Orochimaru's old teaching. Someone has looted a handful of his old hideouts and Kami only knows what they will do with the information and experiments stolen."

Kakashi had a small list of questions forming, but kept them to himself for now.

"Nothing good, that much is for certain."

"Tsunade said the same thing when she agreed to let me go and investigate. I know where several of these places are, if I travel alone I should be able to get to them undetected."

Kakashi nodded his head in understanding.

"It will also help you make peace with your past, even if just a little." It was a reassurance, more than an observation.

"Yes. That is why I need you to make sure that Sakura doesn't follow me. I've told Naruto, he would have known the moment I left the village either way. You know Sakura, she will worry that I am running away. She won't want to let me go this alone, and I have to."

Kakashi took a long look at Sasuke, he couldn't help but feel that the man was underestimating Sakura.

"You are right, the last thing she wants is for you to feel alone, however, do not underestimate her ability to understand what you are seeking. It is your choice to make, but for what it is worth I think you should tell her goodbye in person. On the off chance that I am wrong, I will do my best to make sure she doesn't follow you. Besides, I kind of like knowing who I will have for a medical attendant."

Kakashi let a small smile slip under his mask at the look of surprise on the other's face.

"I didn't realize that position was open, or that she was applying for it. Is that what you were doing at her place?"

Ah, and there it was, the question Kakashi wondered if the other would ask. He schooled his expression into a blank look though.

"In part, it's what we had been training for when I upset her. Genma suggested food as an apology." Kakashi shrugged, his explanation to Sasuke would have passed for a mission report by his standards.

"So Genma gives good advice now?" Sasuke asked quirking a brow.

Kakashi let a small bark of laughter go.

"When it comes to falling out of grace with kunoichi and surviving Genma is an expert, so yes, his advice is worth at least considering. And yes, it did work."

Sasuke stood up and dusted his hands against his pants.

"I'll give it a thought, but if I don't see her I'll buy her some dango when I get back."

He turned with a wave heading in the opposite direction Kakashi would.

"Sure." Kakashi said with laughter in his voice.

"Kakashi, keep her safe."

"I promise.", Kakashi froze after the words left his mouth. He'd promised another Uchiha the same long ago. Could he keep his promise this time?

* * *

Sakura stood by the entrance desk, her eyes focused on the stone bench down the roadway.

She shook her head and started pacing.

Kakashi kept watch from his perch a good distance away. He didn't make a habit of spying on his former team, at least not since they'd become his former students. However this situation was a bit different.

He'd made a promise, and to keep it he needed to know how this parting went.

Sasuke appeared shortly, and Kakashi relaxed a little. The young man was at least giving some heed to the advice given to him these days. Reading lips took a bit more work these days, and he could only make out bits and pieces of the conversation. Her body language told him more.

The way she twisted her body and laughed indicated that she had said something she'd meant to be amusing. The fact that Sasuke seemed prepared for and accepted the hug was a good sign too.

They were standing still so it was back to lip reading, Sasuke seemed to be saying something about a pervert and nurses.

Kakashi shook his head, a thousand jutsus, two wars, and all of the knowledge he has passed on, and what do his comrades say about him? His dark humor mused that he wouldn't know if he wasn't sitting on a rooftop spying on them.

Sasuke reached out and poked Sakura in the forehead.

"Next time."

Not unless he was accompanying them. She wouldn't be leaving Konoha with out the Hokage, and that he would be before Sasuke got back from the way it sounded.

He watched them part ways, satisfied with his reconnaissance. Or so he believed, a split second before he heard the tapping of her foot he registered her presence behind him.

"Enjoying yourself?" she glowered down at him.

He had the presence of mind to act relaxed, while being ready to flee if she decided to attack.

"Yes, I am. It's a beautiful morning." he stretched lazily and used it as pretence to stand up, and eliminate her position of towering over him.

"For spying on Sasuke and me saying our goodbyes?" she raised an eyebrow. Clearly she wasn't going to beat around the bush. Her words irked him a bit though, maybe because the boy had to be lead by the nose to do the right thing by her.

"For making sure he said goodbye, and…" he trailed off. She didn't know that he had been there to keep her in the village as to see if Sasuke would really say his own goodbyes.

"And to make sure I didn't follow him like a love sick dog?" Kakashi took an involuntary step backward, something told him that if he didn't step carefully dumplings would not get him out of trouble this time.

"No, to make sure he actually said goodbye and make sure you were ok. The last time he parted he left you to sleep on that park bench if I'm not mistaken. " Kakashi gestured toward the bench which she had been glaring at earlier in the morning.

That seemed to take all the fight out of her.

"The last time he left it wasn't with the blessing of the Hokage." she said, looking past him at the bench, the past clearly replaying in her mind.

"But is it with your blessing?" he uttered the words softly, and thought for a moment that she hadn't heard him, or would choose not to answer.

"While I would prefer for him to stay, to build the relationships he has left for so long, it isn't my place to choose what is best for him. He knows he has people waiting for his return. He is trying to find his path, not the one his clan, this village or his family designed for him. One that he picked for himself. And that, that has my blessing."

As she looked him in the eye and smiled, though her eyes were slightly watery, Kakashi couldn't help but feel that maybe he had been the one to underestimate her.

He chose then to step into her personal space and wrap his arms around her. Any awkwardness left when she returned the embrace, resting her cheek against his chest.

Neither spoke, so when Sakura's stomach announced its resentment at her neglected breakfast plans both heard loud and clear.

Kakashi was going to act mature, really, he made a conscious effort not to laugh. Which worked until he saw her face flushed with embarrassment. So he choked on his laughter which made it all the worse.

"I'm sorry Sakura. It's just, the look on your face. Here stands before me a woman capable of saving lives with her bare hands or as easily shattering mountains; yet you flush with embarrassment because you skipped breakfast?" He chuckled again.

She laughed with him.

"I know, I know. I was going to go out, but then I got Sai's note and headed here."

Kakashi's was slightly surprised that her information had come from Sai, and filled it away for further processing later.

"Do you still have time to get something to eat?" He asked, smiling as her stomach made another audible request for nourishment.

"I don't have any plans for the day. Are you offering?" Her face held a grin that told him if he agreed that he would be making up for all of the bills he skipped out on.

Yet he couldn't think of any better way to spend the remainder of the morning.

"If you don't mind making a couple of quick stops with me first."

"Sure, like I said, I've got all day." She was unable to hide the surprise in her voice at his silent agreement to pay for breakfast, or maybe it was his other stops that intrigued her.


End file.
